Doesn’t it seem like we – in our humanity, look for … or using a fishing term, cast for burdens? Its like there is an Evil Matchmaker, looking to match up burdens with poor, unsuspecting folk. Us! A match made in …..Hell. Strange thing is, even though they are poison to our souls, we keep dating them! We, in essence say, ” I know he/ she is bad for me but I have hope that they will change”. We become “missionary burden daters!” They become a source of pride and control. How twisted is that?!
We seem to be drawn to them and them to us!
My wife, Sue, struggles with chronic neck and shoulder pain- she is one of my heroes! She never complains about it. God gives her the grace to deal with it, everyday!
I, though, can grow weary of it and burdened. – sometimes out of selfishness. The thinking, “One more thing to deal with in this broken world, why does life have to be so hard” can creep in and lead me down a sin laden path, hindering and if not tended to- breaking my fellowship with the Father and others. Robbing me and rendering me ineffective- powerless!
This impatience showed itself Sunday morning before I left for church. I directed it toward the Father asking Him, boldly, w hutzpah, ” is it asking too much that you heal my wife of this burden?”. ” I really do want to carry this burden to you, believing that you will heal her as you did the woman that had been bleeding all those years”.
I believe I should do this for her and others but I must not come w a spirit of impatience clinging to my back. It comes down to control, as it does most always. Funny though , even though I was carrying this “poisonous” spirit in me, the Lords sweet will was still done before, during and after church. It was like He said as we have many times as parents, ” there’s work to be done right now, you and I will deal with this later!”
He showed me my impatience several times yesterday , but I was too busy with my agenda. It was a great agenda, something He wanted me to do, but….. After we had dealt with my sin of impatience, desire to be in control and lack of thanksgiving as “I gave” the burden to Him before church.
I think it important to note how I “came around” and am now writing about it.
When I was walking Sue to her car this morning, she noticed I was out of kilter. I told her that I had a spirit of impatience I needed to deal with and asked her to pray for me. I proceeded to go on my run, listening to Jaden Lavik’s Roots Run Deep CD on my I-phone. As I listened, prayed and sang I ran along anticipating a breakthrough. The Spirit generally will pull a word or phrase from one of the songs and lead me to repentance and restoration. As my run was coming to a close at the next to last song I heard what I needed to hear. It was the hymn,
What A Friend We have in Jesus.
Songwriters: Jadon Lavik
What a friend we have in JesusAll our sins and griefs to bearWhat a privilege to carryEverything to God in prayer
Oh, what peace we often forfeitOh, what needless pain we bearAll because we do not carryEverything to God in prayerHave we trials and temptations?Is there trouble anywhere?We should never be discouragedTake it to the Lord in prayerCan we find a friend so faithfulWho will all our sorrows share?Jesus He knows our every weaknessTake it to the Lord in prayerAre we weak and heavy ladenCumbered with a load of care?Precious Savior still our refugeTake it to the Lord in prayerDo thy friends despise, forsake theeTake it to the Lord in prayerIn His arms He’ll take and shield theeThou will find a solace thereThou will find a solace thereThou will find a solace there.
I played it four times, letting the message wash over me, leading me to repentance and freedom in Christ. So, let’s wrap this up with this – realizing something is wrong in your spirit is half the battle- the sooner the better! Then taking the time to deal with it, unwrapping it, layer by layer. It’s seldom simple because we are complex creations and sin has roots too, that spread out looking for footing. We must be intentional, positioning ourselves before the Father- asking for illumination and then listening. Reading the word or listening to a favorite word-based CD is great. Old Hymns of the Faith are awesome because they are so filled with truth. It is so important to stick with it, don’t give up. He is faithful and will show up! Come believing and expectantly with thanksgiving. Trusting your “Friend” to meet you where you are, just as you are.
Matthew 11:28
28 Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.
Hebrews 4:15
15 For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin.
Philippians 4:6-7
6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
